Birthday Princess

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"May you live all the days of your life." - Jonathan Swift

"One of the signs of passing youth is the birth of a sense of fellowship with other human beings as we take our place among them." - Virginia Woolf

"At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us." - Albert Schweitzer

Yesterday was December 19th, so I made my way to the Royal Palm Grove of Helumoa in the center of Waikiki to join the celebration of a royal birthday. It was Princess Bernice Pauahi Paki Bishop’s 177th. Hauoli La Hanau, Princess! The great-granddaughter of Kamehameha the Great, she was not only a chiefess of the highest order, but an educated Victorian lady, a Christian, and a member of a legitimate ruling royal family recognized by governments and heads of state throughout the world. She received her Hawaiian name (inoa) "Pau – Ahi" (finished – fire) when a house fire during her baby-hood kneeled and extinguished itself before her chiefly Mana (spiritual power) leaving her unharmed. It was at Helumoa in 1884 that Pauahi established the will & testament that would give birth to a wonderful legacy: The Kamehameha Schools. Though she died later that same year, her beloved husband Charles Reed Bishop carried out her fond wish to educate and succor the native youth of her dear Hawaii, for whom she felt urgent, and lifelong responsibility. Though the Kam Schools was (for a time) operated along the lines of the “Carlisle Indian Schools” model favored in the United States of those days for the “civilization” of indigenous youth, and later as a military school, this institution has become foremost in the field of Hawaiian Studies, Language, and Cultural Practice, and a source of pride to all Hawaiians. Her husband not only founded Bishop Bank, which has grown into today’s First Hawaiian Bank (my bank), and carried out her wishes to endow a first-rate private school, but the Bishop Museum – also founded by him in her honor – is the world’s leading scholarly institution for the research and preservation of Hawaiian and Pacific studies. In attendance yesterday were members of several Royal Societies, including the Daughters of Hawaii, in their antique regalia. Hula Halau Mohala Ilima performed a “name hula” in honor of Pauahi, there were prayers and remarks in Hawaiian Language and in English, and finally the Kupuna Kane (senior men) of the Kamehameha Schools Alumni Glee Club sang some rousing numbers in a style one might have heard at the universities of Oxford and Cambridge in a bygone day – except it was all in perfect Hawaiian. These activities were evidence of a living Mana, not dusty museum exhibits, as the Hawaiian people continue to negotiate their culture’s meaning and purpose from generation to generation. My Hawaiian neighbors are very much contemporary people with both modern and ancient kuleana (responsibilities). Helumoa was referred to in ancient times as an ‘Aina Momona’ – a fruitful land, whose famous palm trees were likened to giant Kahili (feathered Staffs- royal emblems) marking this sacred home of high chiefs. In honor of the day many fine Kahili were on display; and the ladies and gentlemen of the societies held many small ones called “kahili pa`a lima.” (‘Pa`a’ means “fixed, held fast” ‘lima’ is the word for ‘hand’ which I like because it is sort of a familiar nickname. ‘Lima’ means the number ‘5’ so we call the hand ‘the five’ [fingers]. Charming, I think.) To my way of thinking, the rarest treasures on display were these surviving faces of Hawaiian bloodlines: Na Pua(flowers), the Hawaiian people, who are indeed the choicest flower of this `Aina, this land of aloha. Our hearts are full of gratitude to the Ali`i, the Heavenly Chiefs who provided for posterity to the benefit of ALL.
ALOHA! Cloudia

Waikiki Swimming Along

"To see what is in front of one's nose needs a constant struggle." - George Orwell

"With the gift of listening comes the gift of healing."
- Catherine de Hueck

"Do not be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experience."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Walking in Waikiki. . . “Kitty Takes a Dip”
Our third mate, Miss Kitty, is very adept at boat life and usually leaps to the dock with all the aplomb of a life-long sailor. But something must have gone terribly wrong the other day. Perhaps a juicy bird or captivating fish distracted her at just the crucial moment, a sudden breeze, or a feline brainfart. . . I’ll never know for sure, but from below decks I could hear the pitiful, guttural yowling of a deeply discomfited kitty! There on the shore rocks sat a VERY bedraggled and miserable creature resembling a water rat. I wanted to rinse the muck and who-knows-what out of her fur before she could ingest it with that busy little tongue of hers, but she must have thought I was trying to finish her off when I rinsed her in warm water. Being swaddled in a towel, rubbed, loved-up, and spoken to reassuringly was more to her taste, and she endured an unprecedented amount of it. In fact she didn’t leave my side for the rest of the day and night, though I’m proud to report that she is back to her old flair acrobatics. She does continue to spend more time with me than she used to, but I guess she’s simply learned a new appreciation for a warm lap in this sometimes wet and yucky world. . . A tip or two for human swimmers: For the past 20 years, Waikiki has seen a regular influx of jellyfish 10 days AFTER the full moon. So if you are planning a water-sports vacation here you may want to take this into consideration; of course, I like to dip a toe in the surf. . . and then lie in the shade of a palm tree (of which the neighboring lagoon has several wonderful examples). . . Ah the moon! There may be moon over Miami, honeymoons, and moon pies, but there is NO moon like the moon sailing over Waikiki! See for yourself. There’s another trip planning tip: be here for the whole lunar pie-in-the-sky if you can; you may decide to stay for the next one, and the next one, and. . . The Beach Walk project on Lewers Street has a new, classy Italian restaurant at the corner of Don Ho lane. I love Italian food, but can’t help comparing new places with the authentic South Philly parlors of my youth. Being taken to Dante & Luigi’s on it’s narrow city street, with it’s hundred year old waiters, and that unforgettable scent of red tomato “gravy” that has been percolating in the same seasoned pots for decades, was an authentic experience that newer places will simply take time to develop. I wish them Buena Fortuna! And speaking of Don Ho, local funny man Andy Bumatai tells about the time he and Don were driving down Kalakaua, when Don leaned over and tooted Andy’s car horn at a red light. The driver ahead of them climbed down from his giant pickup looking furious and walked back to their car. He was all ready to “beef” until he saw Mr. Waikiki in the passenger’s seat! “Hey Brah, that’s a ‘howzit horn’ no need to get all huhu about it!” said Don, in that unique ultra-relaxed way that he had. Needless to say, the guy was “shame” but he walked back to his truck with a great story to tell about the day Don Ho tooted “howzit” at him. . . “Honolulu” literally means: “Sheltered Bay.” The old folks say that we should call our town “Honolulu Town” or we’re just referring to the downtown harbor itself. OK! Honolulu Town it is. And remember: Manoa, Mo`ili`ili, and Kaimuki were all little towns of their own before the incorporation of the City and County of Honolulu. Today’s C&C covers not only the entire isle of O`ahu, but some surrounding islands and waters, making mayor Mufi the leader of quite a little empire. Take that mayor Bloomberg! (New York City). . . Walking in Waikiki, I feel as if I’m on the visitors’ turf, but when I stroll the other direction to Ala Moana Shopping Center, I feel that the visitors are on our turf (and they are most welcome!) Best international people watching in the world, they should charge admission. Here’s a secret: if you crave a quick, affordable lunch in Japan, simply ascend to the second floor of our own (now locally owned) Shirokiya Japanese-style Department Store. There you will find a delightful confusion of traditional Japanese prepared foods like you might buy and eat on the streets on Tokyo or Osaka. New visiting vendors celebrating regions or seasons rotate through all the time, so check it out. . . Ah! That snap in the air, the hint of Alaska snow in the trade winds, sleeping with a light blanket (and without “below decks sweat”) the hot weather is finally and truly passed. Now comes the good stuff! The hot fudge sundae of cool breezy temps and warm, healing sun that kicks Waikiki a few levels up the heavenly scale are just beginning for "the season." Soon the Royal Hawaiian Shopping Center will complete its major re-imagining, complementing and adjoining Beach Walk. The former cement bunker between Kalakaua Avenue and the beach has been opened up and modernized. A festival of Hawaiian culture and entertainment is unfolding, i8ncluding todays 177th birthday for a princess! (Pictures tomorrow, OK?) Even the venerable pink lady, The Royal Hawaiian Hotel, is so impressed that she will turn around and place her grand entrance to meet the party when she completes her renovations, and has her grand reopening in just a few days. Instead of cement and shop windows we now see palm groves, sky and the pink Grande Dame too. . . just the thing. . . when you are walking in Waikiki. . . ALOHA! Cloudia

Hawaii Writer's Itch

" Good Morning Waikiki!"



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"Local Bananas in Chinatown"


















"Kwan Yin Altar"


"Want some BUMP-lings?"
or
"Won't you be my honey-tripe?"





"It's better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation."
- Melville



"The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously." - Hubert Humphrey


"Most of the writers I know work everyday in obscurity and close to poverty, trying to say one thing well and true. Day in, day out, they labor to find their voice, to learn their trade, to understand nuance and pace. And then, facing a sea of rejections, they hear about something like Barbara Bush's dog getting a book deal.
Writing is hard even for the best wordsmiths. Ernest Hemingway said the most frightening thing he ever encountered was 'a blank sheet of paper.' And Winston Churchill called the act of writing a book 'a horrible, exhaustive struggle like a long bout of painful illness.'" - Timothy Egan, in the New York Times

Today I felt well and truly blank, like a wall or like Hemingway's sheet of paper. After completing my early chores, I escaped to Chinatown. The busy streets, the currents of people and traffic, always make me feel good. Investing your years and memories in a place is what makes it home. The gritty streets of Honolulu's Chinatown say "Home" to me. Come, let's walk along for a bit. We can even stop for dim sum! And when I'm ready to move on to my next home, you can spread my ashes at Maunakea & Pauahi Streets. . . . A L O H A! Cloudia

Whales and Tales

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Ted Trimmer, Maui by Air, top


"Invention is the mother of necessity." - Thorstein Veblen

"One's real life is often the life that one does not lead."
- Oscar Wilde

"The lure of the distant and the difficult is deceptive. The great opportunity is where you are."
- John Burroughs

Lahaina Maui, one-time capitol of Hawaii, is also infamous as the battlefield of the "Whaler-Missionary War" back in the 19th Century. Missionaries were none too pleased when rough & ready sailor-men ("wooden ships, iron men") followed valuable oil - whale oil, that is - to the rich winter calving grounds of the humpback whales off Maui. These guys were no choir boys, and their hard-drinking, two-fisted, profane activities while ashore clashed seriously with the hymn singing, religious instruction, and "useful" labor that the men & women with the monopoly on God were trying to impose, er, offer the benighted Hawaiians. That "war" must have been some brawl! Imagine obscene pirates trading "licks" with fire & brimstone preachers wielding axes, and egged on by their indignant, hatchet-faced wives!

Today we lack the rectitude of the missionaries, and the pure spit-into-the-wind brio of the whaling men, but the whales still winter in Hawaiian waters and they still favor leeward Maui. Today they are protected and admired. Yet small boats of gutsy people still occasionally chase the whales, as one craft did yesterday. These pursuers were not whale-hunters but whale-HELPERS. In response to reports by recreational boaters of a whale entangled with discarded fishing line & nets (some an inch thick!) the team went in search of a giant mammal in distress. The gaffs, hooks, and blades they carried were all designed for the purpose of freeing the intelligent mammal to pursue it's hemispheric ramblings unencumbered. The ensuing water ballet would have baffled the whalers of old, as the scientists and marine specialists worked quickly but carefully to remove the debris straight-jacket. Finally the creature tired of the sport and swam for deep water. Scientists say that enough line has been removed to guarantee the oceanic visitor a good chance of healthy survival. . . To save Earth will require profound changes in our attitudes and activities; But for one afternoon, an important victory had been won. One of many . . . .one at a time . . . Experts estimate that 1700 humpback whales are currently wintering off Maui.

A L O H A ! Cloudia

Fiction & Nonfiction

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King Kalakaua at a lu`au.

Honolulu ca. 1851
Traditonal Grass Hale (house)1800's

"Men show their characters in nothing more clearly than in what they think laughable." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

"If any man wish to write in a clear style, let him be first clear in his thoughts; and if any would write in a noble style, let him first possess a noble soul."

- Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

"We taste and feel and see the truth. We do not reason ourselves into it."
- William Butler Yeats

The two categories of books are Fiction and Non-Fiction, not False & Non- False. Facts can me twisted to say any damned thing, but a story must have some deep truth at it's core - or why would anybody read it? Fiction is truer than non-fiction because without that internal truth it's not really a literary work at all; it is only a literary attempt. . . Like too many of us I rarely read fiction anymore. Never mind that some of the great life-changing relationships of my life have been with fictions: Winnie the Pooh, Babar, Franny & Zoey, Orlando . . Well, recently a good friend, a fan of my little novel (yes, 'fiction') bought me a copy of Molokai, a Hawaii novel by Alan Brennert. I tried to be gracious - not like I'd been given an assignment, but I didn't feel hopeful when I saw the words: "National Bestseller" on the cover! How good, how HAWAII TRUE could this book (by a mainlander!) be?! Then I started reading:

Chapter 1

1891

Later when memory was all that she had to sustain her, she would come to cherish it: Old Honolulu as it was then, as it would never be again. To a visitor it must have seemed a lush garden of fanciful hybrids: a Florentine-style palace shaded by banyan and monkeypod trees; wooden storefronts flourishing on dusty streets, cuttings from America's Old West; tall New England church steeples blooming above the palm and coconut groves. to a visitor it must have seemed at once exotic and familiar; to five-year-old Rachel it was a playground, and it was home.

Certain things stood out in memory, she couldn't say why: the weight and feel of a five-cent hapa`umi coin in her pocket; the taste of cold Tahiti lemonade on a hot day; palm fronds rustling like locusts high above, as she and her brothers played among the rice paddies and fishponds of Waikiki. . . But most of all, most clearly of all, she remembered Steamer Day - because that was when her father came home."

. . . I was tentatively hooked; the names of local places and local things-past always cast a magic spell on me. When Rachel bought fresh bread from Fanny Love (we still have Loves bread!) I was all-the-way hooked!

The story begins in 1891 when Rachel is 7 years old. A Hawaiian Kingdom is her home. During her lifetime the Islands become a Republic, a Territory, and finally a U.S. State, the fiftieth star on the flag. She (and we!) experience the end of routine sail travel, the birth of island flight, the passing of a culture. I remain touched and impressed that a man from California could express the soul of Hawaii, and of her people, with this level of sensitivity and skill. There were no glaring mistakes (common in books by 'outsiders') and many rich surprises for me, plus wonderfully realized characters, several of whom continue to haunt my imagination . . . . This is one of those books that you lose yourself in! I just got teary typing the opening lines, remembering the incidents, those characters, the Hawaiiana, the history, the humanity, the HEART that I found in this wonderful novel! I cherish it as a great work of fiction, and as a deep work of truth about how Hawaii became what she is today. Well done, Mr. Brennert! I won't hold your bestseller status against you. Sometimes the crowd is right. Read Molokai, then come back here to Comfort Spiral to share YOUR thoughts; And to thank me! Mahalo, George Cattermole!

A L O H A! Cloudia

Blog is a Kite

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"You don't need to outdo the competition. It's expensive and defensive. Underdo your competition. We need more simplicity and clarity."
- Jason Fried



Ted Trimmer Photo: Magic Island (Top)


"Imagination is more important than knowledge."
- Albert Einstein

"If you can't convince them, confuse them."
- Harry Truman

My blog is a kite
I send up every day.
Your daily dose of Hawaii
Through my eyes.

Some blogs are fighting kites
Cutting the strings
Of their opponents'
Arguments.

But Comfort Spiral
is a message in a bottle:
"Like minded people
Come out and play."

And like miracles
Or migrating butterflies
You come to display your colours.

The Sky is full of kites
Each one is different
Yes,
Another wonderous day . . . A L O H A! Cloudia

Friend Divorce

Note: Some of you have asked about a post regarding the passing of Bettie Page the "iconic Pin Up" that I posted briefly yesterday. I was concerned that some Comfort Spiralers might find it a risque` "turn off" and removed it. In response to your inquiries I have placed it under today's post for those who want to pay their respects, relive private moments of youth, or be titillated today. You know who you are! ;-0 ;->

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Ted Trimmer: Moon Glade

Cute Nephew, eh? (bottom photo)

"Good manners will open doors that the best education cannot."

- Clarence Thomas (!)

"Prosperity is only an instrument to be used, not a deity to be worshipped."

- Calvin Coolidge

"You meet your destiny on the road you take to avoid it." -Carl Jung

While facilitating after-school groups for "at risk" island teens a few years back, I learned more about life, and about myself, than I ever expected. At 14 they were children. At 18 they were young adults; some even got their diplomas and went on to college or jobs. The kids might cut school sometimes, but they snuck BACK on campus to attend group. The rebel in me liked that, though I frowned officially for the requisite second. We ate, we did "ice breakers," we talked, AND we listened to each other too. Once in a while I took the kids on visualization journeys that they really enjoyed and asked for often. It was amazing to see them settle into a place of calm after they came bouncing into the art room that we used. Occasionally I would write something for them about issues that they were bringing up. These kids didn't exactly have a love of the written word, their complicated lives challenged them daily with more pressing matters than "book learning." The official reason that I was there: "HIV/Aids prevention," speaks only a part of it.
I was touched when the kids would show me creased and dog-eared letters or hand-outs that I had given them months before, and tell me that it meant something to them. I wrote with one eye to the "authorities" who might stop the group if we pushed too many boundaries, so I tried to keep it positive enough to read out loud in a vice principals office at 9am on a Monday. But I tried to share my meagre life-truths with them. In some ways, it was the most important writing I've ever done. When I bump into them today (rare, but small island, eh?) they are adults with lives, and I realize the passing of time as only parents do. They are excited to see me. But I'm MORE excited to see THEM! I know that I have accomplished something for Hawaii by being dependable and real with THEM. My gratitude for this only grows with the years. Here is a piece called: "Friend Divorce." I never realized while writing it for da kids what a relevant and helpful reminder it would become in my own life. . .

Friend Divorce
There will always be meanies and idiots out there trying to share their hurts and resentments with you. They have many clever ways of getting their “hooks” into you. One thing they will try to do is make you feel guilty, or that you owe them something. But never forget: all relationships (outside of your family) are voluntary! Family relationships are special and may need special help, but there is no reason why you have to hang around non-relatives (or even relatives) who make you feel bad about yourself.
Sometimes when we are not confident, or we are lonely, we are glad to hang around with anyone who seems interested in us, or who will tolerate us. But this is not the best position to be in. By feeling, and acting, unworthy we are setting ourselves up to be treated badly. We may be willing to be the “doormat” for cool people, but that doesn’t make us cool – it makes us a doormat for “cool” people to walk over.
Every day people without good self-confidence search for “losers” to look down on. This might seem like it builds them up, but it just makes more meanies and idiots. Really feeling food about yourself doesn’t come from looking down on other people, belonging to the cool crowd, or from the things that we own. A secure person can kick it with whoever they want to at any given time.
Even after you find a friend, problems can and do pop up. It’s only natural. When you are unhappy with a friend don’t jump to assume that it’s their fault right away. First: just spend some quiet time thinking about what it is that you really want out of the relationship. Is your friend triggering some bad experience that you had before with someone else? Are you looking for somewhere to put uncomfortable feelings? Are they REALLY a lying scumbag? In the old days if things were going bad everyone would pick out a goat, the scapegoat, and blame it for all their problems. They would throw stones and drive it away hoping the bad luck and bad feelings would go away with it. Are you making your friend the scapegoat? Are they doing it to you? Only you can answer this for yourself – just take some time to think it through.
After you have taken the time to think first, pick a good time to talk openly with your friend about your true feelings. Don’t just throw them a bomb and run away! Choose a safe time and place and don’t accuse. Start slow. Check things out with each other. Be nice! This is (was?) your friend, after all. Remember, it’s not their job to please you! And it’s not your job to be a judge over your friend. (Or vice versa) Sometimes people just don’t enjoy being together, and that’s cool! They may be great for someone else if not for you. When you are not getting good things out of a friendship, then you just might need a “break” from each other. But sometimes, if you really can’t come to agreement, it might be kindest just to end it.
When you are sure that the chemistry cannot be fixed, a “friend divorce” is an option to consider. But DON”T jump into this drastic step without a lot of thought! It is most important that you are sure that this is what you want, and that you do it with kindness and class, For YOURSELF! That’s the kind of person that YOU want to be.
The best is when the other person doesn’t even know that you wanted to break up with them. You just start drifting away. All relationships are voluntary, remember?
It isn’t a good idea to throw mud on the other person, or yell at them about what a disappointment they’ve been to you. After all, friend divorce means that you are moving on. It’s the last scene in the movie, so don’t go over all your hurts. It’s too late for that. Now you need closure. Be polite and kind.
If you write them a letter, don’t send it right away and DON’T flame them online – that can come back to bite you in a BIG way! Look at your messages with “cool eyes” later and decide then. Writing about your feelings is always a great idea, sending it may not be. You can’t take back that “send” later!
Sure, move on! But do it with class. Friendship isn’t about winning. A friend divorce is always a bit sad even if it’s the best thing to do. If you are confident that you ARE doing the right thing, then you don’t need to convince others by “talking stink” about your ended friendship. You might even come to understand your part in the difficulties. This is called personal growth.
What builds the confidence to be this kind of “evolved” person? The answer, like the path, is different for each of us. But as long as we are looking to others to build us up we will never find it. Finding out who you REALLY are and WHAT you really want takes courage: the courage to look inside honestly.
As you patiently handle life’s challenges, big and small, and as you show true courage day-by-day, your confidence will grow, I promise. Satisfaction, and even joy, will find you when you consistently make good choices.
Lots of people are afraid to look inside, so they create dramas with heroes and villains. You don’t need to find an enemy to make yourself a HERO.